There's talk again about making the public pay for the election campaigns for the U.S. Congress. As if those scoundrels weren't taking enough of our money already, now we're supposed to cough up more to spare them the trouble of raising their own funds. And who is it that's calling for this public financing? It's not the folks who are paying for the campaigns now-- they seem happy enough to put up the millions for the candidates. No, it's these self-described public interest types-- people who aren't paying now and aren't running for office. Busybodies, if you ask me. These liberal do-gooders always want the government taking over whatever isn't nailed down. Leave campaign money to the private sphere, I say. We've got big organizations-- outfits like the NRA and the teachers' union and the chemical companies and the folks who make cigarettes-- that are glad to help the pols. With their big bucks, they get office-holders as buddies and seem happy with the deal. While we're at it, let's make the members of Congress raise their own salaries, too. If a guy can raise $10 million to win a Senate seat, he can keep 1% of it for himself. Then we taxpayers can stop worrying about when these rascals will vote themselves a pay raise again. We don't have to stop there. Take judges. Do you know how much those guys on the Supreme Court make? A lot more than you and I. Why should we pay them, and the thousands of other judges around the country? Privatize, like we're doing with public TV. Just imagine: "These judicial proceedings are brought to you with the help of a grant from Microsoft." We should take advantage of the interest the big guys have in the courts. That Mr. Microsoft, for instance, Bill Gates-- he's always in the courts haggling about anti-trust and competition. And he's got billions! I bet guys like him would be glad to finance a big chunk of our justice system. They could wine and dine their pals on the bench and tell themselves they'd got a good bargain. Remember: it's the private sphere that's made this country great! When the whole world is discovering the blessings of privatization, it should be clear how retrograde this notion of public financing of elections really is. One thing puzzles me, though. If the guys with the big bucks are so happy with their bargains --and our public officials aren't complaining-- just who are the chumps who are getting the short end of the deal? ??